A Quiet Grief

This past week has been emotionally draining. We started with a wonderful celebration of my mother’s 90th birthday in Florida. But the rest of the week was spent in talking with my siblings and parents about their increasing need for assistance. While my stepfather will accept that it’s time, my mom will not go quietly into that good night.

I love that she is guarding her independence, but it comes at a cost. The ravages of a body that is betraying her cognitive and physical strength have also taken our friendship. With forgiveness and patience I forged a new relationship with my mom for about twenty-five years, getting as close as she would allow. I worked very hard to maintain it.

It is the passing of that friendship that I mourn today. I grieve too for the loss of her independence, something I pray I face with grace (and some feistiness as well). I still love her, I still forgive her, but it won’t be the same. It was great while it lasted and I will cherish the memories.