October 17, 2008

Through The Door

As I watch events unfold surrounding Father Geoffrey Farrow, I can’t help but think how I might feel in a similar situation. So many speak in awed tones of courage and compassion, and I am the first to admit I am among them. A combination of integrity, anger, determination, fear and anticipation had to accompany that moment when there was no turning back.

We all have moments when we stand at the open door, having to decide whether we will walk through, for the door will close shortly, whether in our faces or at our backs. The decision is irrevocable and sends us on our way.

I walked blindly for so many years, swept along past doors of decision at the whim of the currents of life. I dealt with what life handed me reactively and not always well. Frequently badly. Regrets? Honestly, only for those times when I hurt others. All else is learning. Boy, have I learned a lot.

Stepping through that door can be uncomfortable to terrifying. But you already know that, don’t you, whether you’ve taken that step or not. It is equally comforting to exhilarating to have passed through. That is not to say it always turns out well. But to have taken the step, to have gone through the mental and emotional contortions required to be able to step, is a life-giving moment regardless of the consequences.

You stand at that open door for this moment in time for civil marriage for same-sex couples. You stand at another door when you see or hear someone being hurt by discriminatory behavior. You stand at a door when you face the choice to speak or write or say nothing.

You can be swept along in the tides, passing those doors of decision. If you do, you may not complain with my earshot—or anyone else’s, for that matter—about the state of things. You think you have no power? You’re right—as long as you choose not to act. Do one small thing. (Don’t look over your shoulder; I’m talking to you.) Step through the door and know what it is to act for your own good or the good of others.


bigislandjeepguy said...

the decision to leave my job and move to the other side of the island has been just what you are talking about for me. i am not sidestepping why i am leaving; it has been as simple as saying, "i'm moving to be with my partner on the west side of the island since we are getting a house together." the bf has joked, "they could be thinking, 'business partner'...", but the conversations have ALWAYS gone on past my statement, including his name, what he does, where he works and a statement such as, "isn't it amazing what love makes you do?" there is no mistaking what partner means here.

sometimes i can hear the "oh...NOW it all makes sense!" tone to people's voice. and sometimes the "holy crap, i didn't even know!" tone.

Greg said...

Ah, Mrs. Birdie, such a happy talent for both words and timing. As always, your thoughts reach inside me, touch my heart and my own thoughts.

These moments, when we choose not to be swept past The Door, but grab hold and leap through, they are the most meaningful, the most thrilling...the ones, perhaps, that make all the difference.

I hope you're having a great day.

MartininBroda said...

There are few places in the world you can go if you need a spiritual advice talked from a heart compassionate by nature. Thanks.

Doug said...

Fantastic thoughts. The power of choice, to take or keep control of our own destinies. So many of us give our control over to others, myself included.

Bear Me Out said...

I'm feeling quite on the threshold. And I'm scared shitless.

As if coming out weren't enough.

I can blunder into things quite well. But with my children, and their mom, I desire to tread carefully for thier sakes. Not easy to do with feet a big and bumbling as mine.

Sooo-this-is-me said...

When you really know you are doing the right thing, it often does not matter what others say.

Ur-spo said...

and most doors are one-way; you can not go back.
But this is a good thing really. Scary but good.