May 14, 2009

Pontoon Boat

Abe finally got his new company car, his first since 1984. In the shitstorm that was 2008, he was supposed to get a Toyota Highlander Hybrid in November. But on the ship, the container that held his car caught fire and they dumped it in the middle of the Pacific Ocean to prevent the fire from spreading. This event was a mere blip on our disaster radar that year.

It’s taken this long to get another, since all hybrids are sold before they ever leave the factory these days. It’s opalescent white and fancy-schmancy and beautiful.

That means Ben gets my old Bonneville and I get the minivan. I’ve had it for one day and I hate it. But I knew I would. I managed to raise two kids to semi-adulthood without one; I do not want one now. Oh, it’s nice enough, I suppose: a Town and Country with Stow ‘n Go® seats that are pretty cool. But I am so not a minivan owner, which puzzles my husband no end. He likes it.

Once when my brother rented a pontoon boat for our families for the day, Ben watched jet skis and motorboats tooling by and moaned that we were on the minivan of boats. That comparison works both ways: I’m driving the pontoon boat of cars.

I loved that ‘94 Bonneville. She isn’t pretty, but boy she has heart. Tell her to go and she says “How fast?” That 3800cc engine lives forever; not so the rest of the car (especially if you rear-end a truck on the ice in winter). She's had her one missing eye replaced but she still has no teeth and will not get them. Her red paint is beginning to oxidize and the leather interior is cracking. She’ll be a great teen car.

My goal now is to find myself a speedboat convertible. Since I have had only three cars in my life—keeping each for a minimum of ten years—I figure this is my last chance to get a fun car. I start looking next week.


bigislandjeepguy said...

hehehe. you said "shitstorm". (i love that it *so* doesn't fit my view of you as such an active member of your church).

my sister had her mid-life...uh...i mean...had her "last chance for fun" and got a mini cooper. which, she loves. and having driven in one with my crazy-driving-ex-coworker, i can highly attest to their speedboat-like prowess.

i am sure we will be seeing you in one, soon.

i have had my jeep wrangler since '95 and never tire of it. just had it completely overhauled about a year or two ago and she's just as good as new. except for a lot of scratches 'n stuff.

THIS IS ME....ONLINE said...

I'm with you about mini-vans. I've actually tried them twice. Good for hauling around all the kid stuff but then they get way in the back and you can't get your hand around their little neck - I mean hand - should you need to.

If you can keep a car that long, you really need to get just what you want.

Java said...

My sympathies, dear, for the loss of your Bonneville. I guess it probably looks kinda rough for a fine woman of your standing to drive to important meetings and stuff. So sad.

I know that minivan mis-fit thing. I SO do not want a minivan! My old truck is just fine with me, especially when it runs well. Which it doesn't, reliably.

Good luck with your search for the perfect Birdie Cage... um, I mean Car. :)

Jeaux said...

Every time you've visited me you've been driving a convertible. I won't answer the door if you pull up in a minivan.

Patrick said...

You're most definitely not a mini-van type, my dear, though I'd love to have you pull up in one only if you were simultaneously blasting Flogging Molly, as you were when I first saw you. Until the convertible shows up, I trust you're using the aural corrective.

Roxrocks said...

I had two minivans...and I miss my last one every time I go shopping. You just can't shop as much when you drive a Neon! (Perhaps this is why Derwood got it for me?)

I'm with Me Online, get what you want! Life is too short to drive a car you hate!

Birdie said...

Patrick, this time it's Great Big Sea, a Celtic band from Newfoundland. Newfie music rocks! Who knew? And yes, it does have a medicinal value.

Laurie said...

I am not a minivan girl either! I can totally understand your desire NOT to have to drive that around. I'd take the oxidizing Bonneville over a minivan anyday!

Good on you for getting a convert! Go topless!

Patrick said...

Ah, that's a good band to have blasting too! In fact our British Columbian friend introduced me to them, and still earns gratitude from me on that count. Life is funny. Anyway, yes, I'd say GBS would be an excellent choice; as I sit thinking about it, I realize how well-suited that music would be for driving in the summer. It practically creates a convertible.

tornwordo said...

I thought I would hate ours but it really is quite useful when you find an old chair in the alley. And it's big enough to sleep in too. Wait, maybe you should give Ben the minivan....